A note on my three blogs


A note on my blogs

(1) vio; in love with india - this one is the main blog about my Indian adventures, which started in 2005. I don't write much on this blog these days because I prefer to write privately in the confidential blog. But check out the categories and the index to figure out your way. I have kept some older posts not about India but which I still find interesting or relevant in Old words. Also check out my new, fun category Only in India in which I post photos of funny, unique, Indian situations...

(2) sounds of india - this is my blog of sounds, because India wouldn't be as incredible if it was not so vibrant and just so full of incredible sounds!

(3) vio; confidential - this an extension of my main blog in which I post entries I do not want to reveal to the entire webspace for privacy or sensitivity reasons. You must receive an invitation from me and then accept the invitation to be able to read it. You may email me if you are interested in receiving an invitation.

Enjoy!

Sunday, 11 August 2013

Post-shamanic testimonial

I initially contacted Kefah, not because I thought I needed a healing, but because I was very eager to find out about my past lives.

Once I passed the gate of her house, the peace and light which emanated from her courtyard literally stunned me, and as soon as I stepped into the therapy room, the warmth and comfort that wrapped me made me feel certain that I had found the right place. Kefah was just like I had found her on her website's picture: calm, loving and reassuring.

First of all we sat together for me to go through my intentions to come to see her, and for her to give me some insight into the procedure we would be going through. At first I was very reluctant to tell her too much about myself, not because I didn't trust her, but because I was tightly holding onto some stupid promise I had made to myself: not to tell her anything about myself that would help her "guess" about my past lives, to make sure she was an authentic shaman. I had heard and read about shamanism before, and I have quite a few close friends familiar to such practices, but I had absolutely no shamanic experience myself, so part of me wanted to "test" her, although I knew it was stupid, and certainly I knew that this close-mindedness would not help her! For a good thirty minutes I tried to go round talking about what had brought me to her without revealing anything actual about myself. Then something clicked; I realised that my attitude would lead us to no-where and most importantly that she wouldn't be doing the work but only guide me through the work *I* would be doing. So I opened my heart, told her my background story and my intentions honestly, and wow I felt a lot lighter! I ended my story with some tears in my eyes already...

Then Kefah invited me to lie down in shavasana (relaxation pose) on the mat in the middle of the room, and I closed my eyes. She started burning some sage, whose fragrance immersed me into an extraordinary sense of peace. Gosh I absolutely loved that smell, so very intense yet so soothing! The first thing Kefah told me to do was to imagine/visualise myself in a peaceful place of my choice. I don't know whether it was the burning sage, or Kefah's drumming which was going to accompany me throughout the entire procedure, but I felt my body sink very heavily into the floor as soon as I had found my peaceful place. I was deeply impressed, firstly because this sensation was extremely pleasant, secondly because although I have being practising regular yoga and meditation for about 10 years, I had never felt such a strong sensation in shavasana ever before. Finally, although I see myself as quite a spiritual being, visualisation, contact with spirits and going into trance were either practices I had never managed to achieve or experiences I had never had. But clearly something was happening there...

During the whole session Kefah and I communicated a lot - she would tell me what to do or where to "go", and I would tell her what I experienced or felt. Her presence was very reassuring throughout the journey. I found it difficult to find my spiritual guide(s), so Kefah took over this part of the work and I had to do the rest - embrace my sensations, my feelings, my emotions, and let her know what was happening... And Spirit clearly didn't see fit for me to go through my past lives; instead S/He sent me another kind of work altogether. Basically I went through some important issues I had with some of my dearest ones. My guide sent me in front of these people, and my work during the spiritual journey was to face them one by one. At no point during the session did I feel disappointed because I wouldn't learn anything about my past lives. I knew the work was going to be difficult, and I cried A LOT during the session (pretty much the whole time!) but I felt I was doing some very necessary and important work indeed. Throughout the entire process, I remember thinking - or rather *feeling*, because it was a kind of "wordless thinking", more like an impression - that what I was going through was really quite mental, and how weird it was that Life had taken me onto this mat with this woman I didn't know, to open myself up to her completely so she would help me go though the depth of my subconscious - many people in my position would have freaked out and run away! But at the same time I had absolutely NO doubt, and it was more than just having no doubt, it was the utter, complete, absolute conviction that I was in the right place, doing the right work, with the right person at that very moment. That feeling stayed with me during the whole session.

When I woke up from my state of meditation I was completely exhausted. I had cried so much that my eyes were burning and my head aching. I slowly gathered myself up and went back to sit on the couch with Kefah so that we would talk about the journey. My tears didn't stop; they kept running slowly down my cheeks as I spoke, in between some deep breaths. I was fine; I just had to let the crying happen until it was happy to end. Kefah told me I had done really well, and that made me cry some more (with happiness!) I felt so much love in her words, a kind of motherly reassuring love, and I knew she was right. Although I was an emotional wreck, I was very grateful, because profound issues had left me with all those tears, and I thought the journey I had gone through with Kefah was a very beautiful one - in just two hours I had stripped my heart open for her to get into it so she would "share my space", as she would say, and it had brought us quite close together! Although I had not received what my mind had wanted (to get to see my past lives), my heart knew that the deep healing I had just received was a lot more important to me at this point in my life, and I was very lucky that Life had brought me to it somehow! As I was leaving, Kefah called me back to give me a bunch of sage, which felt like the kindest gesture on earth...

~

Exactly a month has passed since my journey with Kefah, and I met with those loved ones for the first time since my shamanic experience ten days ago. At first I didn't feel any different, but as the days have passed I have realised that I actually feel a lot lighter in their presence, which allows me to be a lot more open towards them. Those things or words which used to weigh on and bring me down actually have a lot less power than I used to think they had, hence they no longer clutter my mind, or if they do I know better how to find peace again, so I can let go and find solutions more quickly... Needless to say it feels wonderful! Kefah's healing was a miracle...

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